Surviving life as new couple in diaspora

The beauty of moving abroad is the joy of finding your meaning of success and if you believe in the process and truly embrace the values, you will both appreciate the experience and enjoy your new adventure as a couple.

Partnership is key to success

Moving abroad can be a life-changing opportunity if you both open your eyes to endless possibilities and start life away from the distractions of families and social commitments.

However, honesty is key to getting it right as there is little or zero tolerance for deception and control in most Western countries. Partnership is the hallmark of many successful marriages, like the African proverb says to go far, go together. You must be prepared to support each other through all the amazing changes you will experience and the difficult challenges that may come your way to strengthen your marriage and bring you closer to your goals.
Manage your expectations

The reality is that things may not always go according to plan and that can bring immense frustration especially when you think you have everything figured out. Relocation is a journey that comes with its difficulties, and it is often safe to give yourselves the assurance that however the experience, you both focus on enjoying the process without having expectations.

Set healthy boundaries together
A new life abroad will require that you take personal responsibility to cultivate a happy and healthy marriage life which begins by setting healthy boundaries around yourselves. This will help identify things that are likely to cause conflict and issues that have been left unresolved before now. Nothing should be too small or too big to set as boundaries if you can anticipate the impact it can have on your mental health and marital happiness.

Prepare for unpredicted changes

You may have to prepare to start from the bottom of the ladder and learn a new skill so that you can support each other financially which can mean taking up manual jobs temporarily before finding a suitable one. You may also end up as the trailing partner for a while if your other half is the only income earner, you must be ready to make the necessary adjustment without feeling resentful too.

Treasure family bond

Even though you both saw the possibility of moving away from your family as a big relief especially if you or your spouse have toxic family members, however, the thought of missing the family dramas when you live in a peaceful country can also come with a feeling of loneliness. It is important to treasure the bond you shared with your family by staying in touch when you live far away as this can help to reduce loneliness when you are missing home.

Prioritise individual self-care

Happiness is self-responsibility and ensuring that your needs are met not only through your spouse but also outside your marriage is very crucial in finding happiness and fulfilment in a new country. You must learn to take time out for your self-care, and this can mean enjoying leisure activities such as enrolling in a gym even if your spouse is not interested or meeting up for a drink with work colleagues to create a sense of belonging and relaxation.